'And then its' over just as quickly as it began...'

I was talking to a girl named Niki. She liked me. At least thats what she had me believe. There were cons to her from the beginning (which should have stopped me) but I chose to ignore them for the sake of potential happiness. She vehemently told me "you're not in the friendzone" last week. Yesterday she hit me with this one: "I really REALLY like you...we should just be friends." Are you kidding me? Make up your fucking mind bitch. I am used to being friendzoned, but when you say Im not and then put me there anyway Im gonna be fucking pissed. Now shes trying to be ny friend or whatever. Ugh. This will not end well. Lose 50lbs and STILL not date-able. I guess my personality is really just that shitty.

Let Down Again?

You'd think I would be used to being disappointed/let down by my friends, but nope. Every time I ask them for something and they let me down it never gets any easier. I keep clinging to the disbelief that they will let me down. I hope they would realize how important things are to me, but nah.

Im fucking tired of them. And tired in general actually. So very tired...